


In Wildest Dreams

by peetasblueyes



Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Infidelity, Tumblr: promptsinpanem
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-22
Updated: 2015-10-22
Packaged: 2018-04-27 14:31:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5052175
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peetasblueyes/pseuds/peetasblueyes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After a nine-year hiatus, Katniss Everdeen returns to the big screen. Everything is fine until she finds herself falling for her irresistibly charming co-star, Peeta Mellark. Only problem is he isn’t hers to want. Inspired from Taylor Swift’s music video “Wildest Dreams”</p><p>Written for Prompts in Panem: round 7, day 7 (thorns)</p>
            </blockquote>





	In Wildest Dreams

A long black curl falls down from where it had been perfectly placed and tangles itself onto the makeup artist’s brush.

 

“Octavia! Keep the hair in its place. How am I supposed to make Katniss’s eyes smoky if they’re blocked?” Effie exclaims at her co-worker. It had been the fourth time this particular lock fell. It just won’t stay put.

 

“Honestly, it’s the hair, not me. It’s so thick and heavy,” Octavia complains. “Not to say that you don’t have lovely hair, dear. I suppose we’ll just have to bobby pin it into place.” She gently pats the actress on the shoulder before sauntering over to a nearby table to scrounge for supplies.

 

“I still don’t understand why this is necessary. My normal hair would have worked perfectly fine, I’m sure of it,” she grumbles, rolling her eyes. She isn’t exactly a Hollywood diva, but Katniss had been sitting in this position for at least three hours now. The endless daily hair and makeup routine gets old very quickly after the first week, and her butt was starting to get numb.

 

“Sweetie, please don’t do that. I’m trying to apply the eyeliner,” Effie scolds her. “And you know this is all the director’s orders. Haymitch has a clear vision of what he wants for this film. Also as Octavia said, you have lovely hair, but let’s be honest. Your signature braid isn’t exactly 1950s.”

 

The eccentric hairdresser makes her way back to Katniss, prepared with tools to securely pin the curl against her forehead as intended. Admitting defeat, the actress slumps back into her seat, waiting for her crew to finish. No longer held captive by the makeup brush, her eyes roam around the beautiful savanna surrounding them. October is perfect weather for Cape Town. It marks the last month of the dry season, so the air isn’t overwhelmingly humid. It’s warm during the day with the heat of the sun beating down, but after sundown, the air chills just enough to sleep comfortably.

 

Her acting career began when she was six. A few commercials here and there and minor roles in films boosted her profile. Then, she hit a blockbuster when she was fourteen. The lead role in a novel-based movie about a dystopian world where her character rose as the unexpected heroine garnered the fame and credibility Katniss Everdeen maintains today. After giving four years to this franchise, she withdrew from the industry. Completely going off the grid, she refused every movie script, photoshoot, and commercial opportunity. She even turned down requests for celebrity appearances to events. But after nine long years, she had returned from her quasi-retirement.

 

With the last bit of hair fluffing and the swipe of scarlet red lipstick, she is finally finished. Careful not to accidentally mess up her perfectly coiffed hair, Katniss shifts slightly in her chair and subsequently freezes when the corner of her eyes catch a head of dark blonde waves. He’s leaning against the hood of a jeep, only a few feet away from her makeup station, concentrating as he studies his script.

 

Peeta Mellark, her costar. Really, the only reason she agreed to come out from her retreat. She was determined to live her life quietly, for the rest of her existence. But Haymitch asked her for a personal favor. He had flawlessly thought out everything for his new film, including the cast, and wouldn’t settle for anyone other than her. She still would have refused if he hadn’t slipped out who her male counterpart would be. Peeta Mellark was a dream that could become reality. He was her James Dean. Perfect, tall, and handsome as hell. Just the thought of working with him? The temptation was enough for her to accept Haymitch’s offer.

 

Much to her dismay, they’ve hardly worked any scenes together. This past week of shooting has mainly consisted of separate scenes building up to their characters’ meeting. She continues to watch him while he mouths his lines to himself over and over. She mentally traces from his eyes, down the curve of his nose, to his sharp jaw hidden beneath the dark blonde stubble. When his eyes flit up in her direction, he curls his lips into a crooked smile. Shyly, she turns her head away the opposite way.

 

“I wouldn’t mind taking a ride on  _that_  jeep myself.” She jumps at the sound of Effie’s voice.

 

“You wouldn’t dare, Eff!” She playfully pushes the arm of her makeup artist. They giggle together softly, like a couple of high school girls gossiping by their lockers.

 

“You want to bet?” Effie challenges her with a smirk and a cocked eyebrow. “Kidding! Besides, he and his fiancée are all the tabloids can talk about lately.” Katniss’s face falls immediately at the mention of Peeta’s fiancée. Of course, it’s hard to ignore. It’s been all over the news for a few months now. Peeta Mellark and Glimmer are  _the_  power couple.

 

“Right, he’s engaged now.” She begins to chew on her lip. Effie audibly cringes in disdain and shoots Katniss an annoyed look for messing up her hard work.

 

“Oh, sorry. I forgot. It’s been a while.” Katniss apologizes. She rubs her lips back and forth together to redistribute the lipstick that might have rubbed off onto her teeth. “Looks like I’m finally being summoned.”

 

She hops off her chair and walks over to a marker in front of the director and camera. Peeta promptly does the same, shrugging off his robe and handing it to an assistant. He gives her the same lopsided grin when they make eye contact. A blush blooms over her cheeks instantly.

 

“Alright, let’s get this started!” Haymitch yells over the crew. “I want to begin with the big reunion. Remember, you two are separated lovers.” He takes a second to position the actors into place and talks with the camera crew for a few minutes before calling action.

 

_“Marjorie? Marjorie Finn! I know that’s you, don’t run from me.” Taking long strides, he grabs her shoulder._

 

_“I didn’t come back for you, Kinglsey.” She tries to shrug his hand off her. Instead, this provokes him to step in front of her. His other hand cups her chin. Her eyes are already glossy with tears. “You had your chance.”_

 

_“I still love you. I…,” He hesitates, rubbing his thumb across her cheek. “I wrote you, every day. I never stopped thinking about you.” Her lips part in disbelief. Her eyes flit, searching for lies in his._

 

_“That’s… that’s not possible. They told me you never wanted to see me again. That you already met another woman. That I should do the same.”_

 

_“Those are all lies! You have to believe me. You have always been the only one for me.” He holds onto her face firmly before leaning in for a kiss. She waits a few chaste seconds before tearing away._

 

_“Is that a promise?” She breathes closely against him._

 

“CUT!” Haymitch’s screech cuts through the intimate scene, eliciting a jump from the startled actress. “You call that a kiss, sweetheart?” Katniss crosses her arms and glares at the director. “You’re finally reunited with the love of your life. Show some emotion. Again!”

 

Peeta leans in again and she holds her breath involuntarily. Her stomach flutters as his arm wraps around her waist and pulls her in closer. It seems impossible to kiss for more than a few seconds at a time. Each take, Katniss pulls away impulsively, flustered. After a dozen more tries, Haymitch suggests they continue into another scene.

 

“Listen, sweetheart. I know it’s been a while, but right now you’ve got as much charm as a dead slug. Don’t make me regret casting you. I chose you, and only you, for a reason,” he whispers into Katniss’s ear. She grumbles as he casually walks away. It’s not like she was terrible at acting. There’s a learning curve when working with new actors.

 

“Don’t worry. We both have to warm up to each other before kissing passionately. It’s not easy to be thrown into that scene, even for the best actors.” Peeta smiles warmly at his costar, easing her nerves.

 

“Thanks. I guess I need to get back into the acting mindset,” she admits timidly, though her scowl remains. “It doesn’t help that we barely know each other.”

 

“I suppose we’ll just have to change that then.” He winks then walks away to get his makeup retouched.

 

They manage to film a couple more scenes before a loud rumble darkens the skies. “Dammit, rain season decided to begin early. Clear the equipment, and fast!” Haymitch barks and everyone shuffles as quickly as possible. “That’s it for today, we’ll start again tomorrow if the weather isn’t shit.”

 

Katniss heads toward her trailer, leaning against the railing. The crew runs back and forth everywhere, and she smiles at the chaos in front of her. Haymitch continues to yell orders, while cameras and lights are carried away. It feels nice to be on a set again.

 

The skies reflect the same cloudy grey as her eyes. In admiration, she decides to stay outside to watch the storm. She becomes occupied with staring above at the angry clouds consuming the dark blue. By the time Katniss breaks away from the stormy trance, the set was almost all cleared away. From a distance, she sees Peeta stepping out from his own trailer. His gaze fixes onto her and he takes long, purposeful strides towards her direction.

 

“You wanna get out of here?” Peeta asks casually. He’s already changed out of his film clothes. His blue button down shirt tightens slightly across his broad chest and the short sleeves are wrapped snugly against his thick arms. What she would do to just run her fingers underneath the hem, to pop open each button. “I can drive us out of the city, away from all this.”

 

Surprised, she shakes her head faintly, in an attempt to clear the wanton thoughts in her head before one accidently slips out, “Where?”

 

“Anywhere you want.” He shrugs, taking a cigarette out from his back pocket. He licks his lips before carefully placing the stick between them and lighting. Taking a long drag, his eyebrows raise up anticipating her answer.

 

Watching him do something as simple as blow out smoke has her weak with desire. He is irresistibly charming. It seems dangerous, but she decides to ignore the small voice in her head. “Okay,” she manages to stutter. “Just let me change.”

 

* * *

“How do you know these roads so well?” she questions after driving for a while. She begins to wonder if he even knew where he was taking them when they sped off or if they’ve simply been driving around aimlessly. Either way, she wasn’t complaining. The drive felt refreshing. Since her arrival, she had spent all her time working or in her trailer.

 

“What, you mean you don’t have the road map of South Africa ingrained in your memory like I do?” Peeta teases her. He rests his left elbow at the edge of the window while he drives. His right hand drums against his thighs in no particular rhythm.  Katniss glances in his direction every now and then, but stares at her feet or the outside scenery for the most part.

 

She rolls down the window to stick her hand out into the breeze. They’ve managed to drive away from the storm, although its arrival would be imminent. “Are we ever going to get to our destination?”

 

“Well, aren’t you an impatient one. That’s not a helpful trait to have as an actor, you know.” He smirks and she responds with an annoyed glower. “Just a little longer, sweetheart,” Peeta says, mocking the nickname Haymitch had so generously given her. Somehow, her scowls don’t seem to scare him the way it does everyone else.

 

The ride has been long, but not as uncomfortably intimidating as she had imagined it could be. Her mind had wandered to the worst scenarios possible when Peeta asked if she wanted to drive around with him. She imagined them having absolutely no chemistry that even the best acting skills wouldn’t be able to save their movie. Consequently, it would get cancelled and she would never have a chance to work with him again.

 

Instead, she finds him to be easygoing and talkative. He makes simple small talk, asking her questions about past roles and experiences, and the conversation never drops dull. She asks him questions about his life as well; though the one question she desperately wants to ask, she just can’t bring herself to.

 

“We’re here.” Peeta shifts the car into park and unbuckles his seat belt . He runs over to open the door for Katniss, but by the time he does, she’s already out of her seat. They lean against the hood of his jeep together.

 

“We… we spent hours driving out of town for this?” She crinkles her nose at the empty plain in front of her. It’s the same view she’s had from the car window for the past hour. While the vast land is beautiful, it didn’t seem like something that they had to drive very far to see. Not to mention how daunting the endless field made her feel, as if they were mere dots of a much greater picture. “Not that I don’t appreciate nature, but I don’t quite understand–”

 

“We’re surrounded by big cities and people all the time. LA, New York, even in Cape Town. I just wanted to get away from it all. I try to find places like this everywhere I shoot.” Peeta looks far into the plain, breathing in the sight. His throat bobs as he sucks in the fresh air. “Usually I like to be alone, but you seemed like you could be good company. The type of person who could use a bit of a break it from all too. There’s no pressure here, no expectations, no lies. I can be myself.”

 

Katniss nods in silence, relating to the sentiments behind Peeta’s words. “You can be yourself,” she repeats quietly.

 

“When I got my first job, I was so excited to finally be in something that people could enjoy. The idea of entertaining people made me really happy. I wanted to be the reason viewers would smile or cry. My agent at the time warned me that as rewarding as this industry can be, it can become dangerously brutal too.” He reaches into his pocket to grab another cigarette before pointing the box towards her, gesturing to take one, which she kindly refuses. “I told myself that no matter what, Hollywood wouldn’t change me. That they don’t own me. I’m not some actor they can control and use, like a piece in their game. I promised myself I would remain the same person, me.”

 

She studies his facial expression, his brows furrowing together as he inhales the smoke into his lungs. He runs his hand briskly through his messy hair. After waiting in silence, Katniss wonders if he was going to finish his story. “And?” she asks warily.

 

He shuts his eyes and pauses, breathing so deeply through his nose that it flares in bitterness. Peeta thins his lips together tightly, and when he opens his eyes again, they’re glassy. “And I broke my promise,” he chuckles humorlessly, his voice filled with disappointment. Bringing the cigarette up to his pursed lips, he takes another drag and another and another. It burns out quickly and he flings the butt far away.

 

“I–” Katniss wraps her arms around herself, unsure of how much she wants to share with Peeta. He makes her feel comfortable and for some reason she finds herself wanting to tell him secrets she’s never shared with anyone else. “I started acting to support me and my mom. I wanted to act when I was younger, but it was ultimately because of my mom that I started. We needed money, desperately. I was incredibly lucky. I got cast in a commercial after my first audition. Then I landed a few guest stars on TV shows. But my mom was never satisfied. She continued to push me to audition for role after role. After I got the part as a lead of a franchise movie, I thought we would be set.”

 

She smiles meekly as Peeta makes eye contact with her, attentively listening to her story. He edges closer until his thigh touches hers.

 

“It wasn’t enough, was it?” He understood.

 

“It was never going to be enough,” she shakes her head. “She began to obsess over the money I made. She grew accustomed to an extravagant lifestyle quickly. I never wanted that. I just wanted us to have enough money to eat, have a house, not worry about rent. I didn’t even care about being famous.”

 

Peeta rubs his hand over his mouth and jaw. It scratches against his short stubble, “I’m sorry. That’s a tremendous amount of burden you carried. You didn’t deserve that.”

 

“Once the last movie was released, I had enough money to sustain myself if I spent it carefully. I was finally 18, so…” Katniss chews on the bottom corner of her lip. This is the part of the story she’s doesn’t tell most people. “So, I officially emancipated myself from my mother. I’ve been on my own ever since. The court mandated a restraining order so she couldn’t solicit money from me anymore. But I still miss her sometimes. She was my mom.”

 

“Sometimes it’s the things we love the most that destroy us.”  Peeta places his hand on top of hers gently, which is resting upon the hem of her dress. “But what your mom did was take advantage of you. You did the right thing and doing the right thing takes courage and strength,” he reassures, continuing to maintain eye contact with her.

 

“I know. I tell myself I did, but sometimes it’s hard to face the consequences of the choices we make.” She wraps her thumb around his hand, rubbing back and forth. They feel impossibly close. She could carefully count each eyelash that adorn his blue irises.

 

“Hey, you want to see the best part of this view?” He distracts Katniss from their serious conversation. Flashing a smile, Peeta points in front of them. They must have been talking for a while, because the sun that once beat down on them is now setting. The flat land provides a clear horizon for the golden ray of light. The sky is tinted dark in a gradient haze of blue, purple, and orange. There are gloomy clouds threatening to wash away the painting before them. She had never witnessed something as beautiful as this before. It’s breathtaking.

 

“Thank you. For letting me escape here with you,” she says, tiptoeing off the jeep and walking toward the sunset. The bottom of her dress sways with the gentle breeze. “I’m always alone in LA. I didn’t realize I needed this here. Anytime you want a retreat, I’ll be there.” Peeta pushes himself off of the hood and slowly follows her footsteps. Before they can enjoy another moment of the landscape, drops of water begin to fall down upon them.

 

Instead of running back into the car as fast as she can, Katniss spreads her arms open and throws her head back, embracing the rain. For the first time ever, she’s completely opened up about her mother. She feels free.

 

Her dress soaks up the rain, and her perfect curls fall back into its natural wave. Katniss laughs in simplicity and candor. When she finally stops, Peeta is alarmingly close to her. She looks up at him through her dewy lashes. Her mind floods with every bad possibility that could happen. It isn’t right. But when he pushes the damp bangs away from her face and cups her jaw, there is only one thing that registers in her mind.

 

They both lean in, their mouths press against each other heatedly. Peeta snakes his arms below her waist to lift her into the air. Katniss groans at the way their bodies touch, flush against one another, and her mouth opens slightly. He takes advantage of the gap and slips his tongue between her parted lips. She sucks on his lower lip greedily, taking what she can in this fleeting moment.

 

They continue to kiss passionately, exploring every crevice possible, before Peeta pulls away. Her lipstick is smeared and there’s a good possibility that her makeup is running from all the rain. Yet he still looks at her as if she’s the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen. “Katniss,” he whispers hoarsely.

 

“I’m–I’m sorry.” She pushes her hands on his shoulder and takes a step back. Regret tumbles off her tongue. “I shouldn’t have done that. I should have stopped this.” She wipes the remaining lipstick off on the back of her hand and distances herself away even more from Peeta, but he treads forward. Eyes confused, lips swollen. Every step she takes back, he insists on taking two forward.

 

“Is this a bad thing? I thought–” He reaches for her hand, to which she promptly pulls away. “Did I misread you? Is this not what you wanted?”

 

Katniss glares at him in disbelief. How could he even ask that? “You’re engaged!” she sputters out. “Unless what you thought I wanted was a scandal, then no. This is not what I had in mind.”

 

Devastated, his eyes drop cold. “No… You know about Glimmer?” Peeta shakes his fingers through his tangled wet hair. Every inch of their bodies is drenched, yet neither of them makes an effort to move. “You have to understand.”

 

“No. Stop, please.” She holds her hand up, the palm facing towards Peeta. Taking a deep breath, she continues, “In any circumstance, she is still your fiancée. Just take me back to the set.” Her voice is firm but shaky. She tries to convince herself that the trembling is from the cold rain, not from the large amount of effort she has to muster together to stop them from making a terrible mistake.

 

“It’s not real,” Peeta informs her, his eyes flickering with defiance. “Glimmer and I. It’s not real. She’s practically Hollywood royalty. Her family has been in the business for generations. They own half the shares of our entertainment company. I met her a couple times at events and when the press began to spread rumors about us, my agent insisted we go along with it. It would be good for my image, and it was. I started to get job offers left and right, as long as she was by my side at every premiere.”

 

A chill runs down her spine from his confession. Katniss wraps her arms around her body and sways back and forth. Her mind clouds up, conflicted at the decision to be made at hand. She desperately tries to cling onto the fading ounce of guilt in her gut and moves towards the vehicle.

 

Swiftly, Peeta blocks her from opening the car door. His arms placed on either side of her entrap Katniss against the cold metal. “Please. Tell me you don’t want this. Tell me you don’t feel the same.” He pleads with desolation. “I want to be myself again, Katniss, and right now I am. No expectations, no lies. Just me and you.”

 

He doesn’t have to say it explicitly for her to understand. His situation is clear. As much as she wants to fight it, she doesn’t have it in her to push him away. His eyes reflect emptiness and pain that she wants to fill. They stand in hesitation with nothing but droplets falling between them for what seems like an eternity, until she finally closes the distance between them and embraces him fully. He presses his nose against her cheek.

 

She stares at his lips before giving in, planting a soft kiss. “No one has to know what we do,” Peeta assures her.

 

“No one has to know,” she repeats with a nod.

 

* * *

They spend the rest of their time together in secret. Slyly glancing at each other from across the set, then sneaking to each other’s trailers at night. It’s comforting to sleep against Peeta’s chest. The way he pulls her closer into his arms makes her feel safe. Listening to the rhythmic beat of his heart and his soft snores lulls her into a calm slumber every night. Nightmares no longer terrorize her dreams. Although, it is admittedly just as unsettling to wake up to a bed that is cold and empty.

 

After three more weeks of constant shooting, the tone of the set has gotten lighter. Everyone greets each other by their first name and with a smile. Despite shooting a serious romantic drama, they joke between scenes and made more than enough footage to make a compilation for the gag reel. Katniss still attempts to maintain her distance from Peeta in public, deathly afraid of someone catching on to their antics.

 

“Peeta, I’m kind of scared,” she confesses while putting on his shirt. It smells just like him and she’s made a habit of stealing them to wear to bed. Because she takes one every night, his clothes are all over her room. It’s a wonder how he still manages to wear something new everyday.

 

“Why?” Peeta pats his hand on the empty space next to him for her to lie down.

 

“While Effie was touching up my makeup in between takes today, she hinted that you and I seem friendlier lately. It came out in the middle of nowhere. Somehow the way she said it insinuated that everyone knew.” Katniss snuggles into the comforter and nuzzles her cheek into the crook of his neck.

 

Peeta combs his fingers through her dark hair, loosening it from the braid. She hums contentedly. There was something very relaxing and intimate about the way he untangles her hair. “Would it be so terrible if they did find out?” he questions with hope.

 

“Yes,” she sighs into his chest. There’s no use in arguing. The answer could never change and they both know it. “We need to be more careful.”

 

Peeta leans down to catch her mouth. His lips are soft and Katniss reciprocates his movements willingly. Her tongue sweeps his upper lip and eventually slides in deeper. He shifts positions to hover over her body, without breaking contact. A desperate moan slips out from her mouth when Peeta presses his erection close to her center. His fingers skim beneath her shirt, lightly tracing upwards to her nipples. She writhes under his languid touch, jutting her chest out in frustration.

 

“So what exactly did you have in mind?” Peeta murmurs softly before slithering under the sheets, covering every inch of her body in lazy kisses.

 

* * *

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” In the middle of their kiss take, Katniss begins to make a scene. With all the force she can, she shoves her costar with contempt and fury. “How can I be expected to work with him when he can’t even be a decent human being?” she screams at Haymitch and stomps away. Of course, Effie immediately runs up to her, delicately comforting Katniss while also trying to preserve the perfectly done hair and makeup.

 

Just as she did, Peeta stomps away from the set as well. “She’s fucking crazy,” he yells in rage, kicking a mindless prop in his way. “If you can’t do something about her, this movie is never going to get done, Haymitch.” He snarls at the director before disappearing into his trailer.

 

“Goddammit. You two are supposed to be the least problematic part of my job.” Aggravated, Haymitch throws the script onto the floor. Effie lets out a startled gasp, widening her eyes in distaste. “You,” he points to Katniss, “You’re coming with me. We need to talk.”

 

Reluctantly, she follows behind him, pouting like a puppy who knows it’s about to get scolded. They walk into his trailer and Katniss braces herself for a long lecture about being a diva and how it isn’t helping anyone when she’s incapable of playing nice with her coworker.

 

Haymitch immediately walks over to his minibar, looking for drinks. He digs the palm of his hands into his eyes and sighs deeply. But when he turns and looks at her, there isn’t punishment in his expression. “What is it, sweetheart? More boy trouble?”

 

“What? What boy trouble?” she scoffs, slightly caught off guard by his remark. The trailer isn’t exactly messy, but it’s clustered with papers everywhere, probably drafts of scripts or ideas. She lifts a stack of papers from an arm chair and places them onto the ground as she lowers herself onto the seat. When she settles comfortably into the chair, Katniss purses her lips waiting for Haymitch’s rant.

 

“I know about you and lover boy. I don’t know what kind of petty fight you had, which isn’t hard to imagine, because you are one stubborn brat.”

 

“Haymitch!” Katniss scowls at him. If anyone else had called her that, she would be packing to go back home. Damn the movie and all. But Haymitch is different. He was her first director; her mentor. When she knew nothing about the business, he showed her the tricks and tips to get around.

 

“But I assume it was nothing major, seeing as how you two were snuggling together just last night. I swear if you don’t get your shit together for my movie…” He trails off, chuckling smugly. He pours himself a glass of dark alcohol with two ice cubes. It’s not until he takes a couple sips of his drink that he begins to explain. “I’m up before everyone else. Heck, there are days when I don’t even sleep. You kiddos aren’t being as careful as you think. I see it every morning. One of you always runs off to your own trailer before the day starts.”

 

“You can’t tell anybody about this,” Katniss asserts firmly. There’s only two more weeks of shooting left before everything returns back to the way it was. She’s determined to spend the next two weeks happily in bliss like she has this entire month, not cowering in shame and regret from the gossip buzzing around the set for sleeping with someone’s fiancée.

 

“That shouldn’t be a problem,” he assures her, but he’s quick to shut her down when her face lights up from his affirmation. “Unless you two continue to disrupt my set like you did today. Then, I have no control over what slips off of my tongue, sweetheart. Especially when I’m drunk. Deal?”

 

“Deal.”

 

“I’m going to give the crew the rest of the day off, so I can enjoy the rest of this bottle.” He’s already polished off his first glass and refilled it to the brim. “I suggest you take this time to reconnect with your lover.”

 

Katniss rolls her eyes, but secretly smiles to herself. She definitely has some plans to reconnect with Peeta.

 

* * *

“So–we’re not–in–big–trouble?” Peeta asks in between kisses.

 

After her talk with Haymitch, Katniss went straight to her trailer to change and freshen up before going to see Peeta. Except once she stepped into the dark room, the lights immediately flashed on and a pair of thick arms slung around her shoulders from behind. She definitely would have screamed if it weren’t for the recognition of his unique scent, a mixture of aftershave and cologne. It’s clean, fresh, and woody. It was Peeta.

 

He swept her dark curls over to one shoulder and placed tender kisses along the nape of her neck, asking what took her so long. Through ragged breaths, she explained it all. Skillfully, he snaps open the top buttons of her blouse to slip his hand inside. Katniss whimpers as he firmly kneads her breasts over her sheer bra. His erection grinds against her lower back. “Maybe you were right. Fighting wasn’t really necessary,” she moans.

 

“No,” Peeta growls and spins her around to face him, grasping tightly onto her shoulders. His pupils are dark and dilated. “Do you know why I went straight into my trailer after our little fight?”

 

“Why?” Katniss plays innocent, widening her eyes and batting her lashes. She runs her fingers lightly up and down his arm. He writhes at her touch. “Tell me, Peeta.”

 

He grabs her wrist, frustrated by her teasing. “You drive me crazy. Everything you do, even the little things.”

 

“Like what?” She tilts her head, her sly smile evoking more frustration out of Peeta. Tauntingly, her tongue darts out and traces the outline of her lip. She knows how much her tongue turns him on.

 

“I had to get out of there before anyone noticed.” His voice is staggered. They’re so close to each other, she can feel his hot breath mixing in with hers. Their lips hover slightly, coyly avoiding contact.

 

“You liked it,” she gasps. Pushing her small hand against his solid chest, Katniss pushes her costar forcefully until he’s backed up against the wall. She rubs herself against his body like a cat in heat. Desperate for friction, Peeta mimics her motions, thrusting his hips to meet hers. “Say it. Tell me what you liked, what it did to you. I want to hear you say it,” Katniss demands, articulating every word sharply. She whispers into his ear. Her tongue skims the sensitive skin, licking its way down to his jaw.

 

“Yeess,” Peeta hisses. “The way you took charge, you were so aggressive. I’ve never seen you like that before. I thought I was going to explode,” he bursts out loud, unable to contain himself. “It turned me on so much.”

 

Katniss can feel herself leak into her underwear from his confession. “Good boy, was that so hard?” she rewards him, crashing her lips against his. He lets out a soft sigh of relief, then sucks and licks every inch of her mouth eagerly. She nips at his bottom lip. Her teeth grip at the supple exterior, biting down hard enough to elicit a satisfying moan.

 

They kiss passionately until Peeta can’t stand it anymore. “Katniss, please. I don’t know how much longer I can wait.” His crotch has an impressive tent, just waiting to be released from its confinement. She entertains his frenzied plea by cupping the outline of his dick through the thick material. He lets out an uneasy moan when she releases him after only two pumps.

 

“Looks like you need a nice, cold shower.” She unbuttons the rest of her blouse and shakes it off onto the floor. Taking a few steps back from Peeta, she unhooks her bra and slides it down too. Her dusky nipples pucker up at the exposure. Katniss proudly smiles when she sees how Peeta sucks in air harshly through his teeth. “I want you to stay here. You’re going to count to one hundred and then follow my trail into the bathroom. If you come in a second too early or late, you will be punished. Understand?” Peeta swallows thickly and nods.

 

She slips off the rest of her clothes, piece by piece, and disappears into the bathroom. Mentally counting each second, he rushes to undress himself. The agony is killing him and there isn’t time to waste.

 

Right at the one hundredth second, he slips into the bathroom. The air of the room is already thick with hot steam. He can see her silhouette through the glass doors of the shower. Peeta’s erection throbs painfully at the alluring sight. He opens the doors and slides into the shower.

 

“I should’ve said fifty seconds. That wait felt entirely too long,” Katniss murmurs underneath the showerhead. She slants her lips for another kiss. This time it was demanding and hungry. His hands tangle into her damp hair. She skims her fingers from his broad chest to the downy hair below his belly button. Peeta grunts when she finally touches his hard cock. It looked impossible for him to get any bigger, but he swells under her touch. Slippery from the water, it pumps easily up and down in her grip before her thumb lightly traces around the head. It leaks with precum which she generously spreads all around the smooth erection.

 

Peeta roughly latches onto her taut breasts. With one hand, he pinches the hard peaks, rolling it between his thumb and index finger. He swirls his tongue around her other breast and gently bites down onto the tight bud. “You’re perfect,” he whispers seductively. “Just the right size for me.”

 

Katniss squirms, moaning in pleasure and pain. “D-don’t stop.” The more he suckles her, the firmer she grips his cock.

 

Releasing his hold on one of her breasts, Peeta drags his fingers down to her center. Pressing one finger against her clit, he rubs it in small circles. Once Katniss starts mewling, his fingers plunge lower into her slick folds. He continues to pump at the same pace she does for his dick, in sync. Her whimpers grow louder until they turn into screams. When Peeta finally withdraws his fingers, they glisten, coated thoroughly with her arousal.

 

Still quivering from her climax, Katniss is awaken from her trance as Peeta nudges her against the wall. He snakes down to his knees, leveling his face to her crotch. He plants wet kisses with an open mouth on her thighs, inching up higher and higher. Her lips are already swollen and slick. It throbs when Peeta reaches the center. He painfully takes his time, kissing everywhere except where she wants. Katniss squirms, shifting her hips with anticipation.

 

“Wait,” he growls, placing his hand to steady her movements. Katniss whines in agony. He takes his finger to spread her apart, tracing the edges. “You’re so pretty. Look at how wet you are already.” Peeta taunts, sticking one finger in and withdrawing it just as fast. He shows Katniss his arousal-slicken finger and she bends down to suck it greedily. His eyes darken, nearly black.

 

“Do you taste good?” Peeta rasps, watching her tongue eagerly twirl around his thick finger. When she nods, he finally buries his head between her thighs. She yelps at the unexpected contact of his tongue flattening against her folds. He dips into her entrance with ease. Her entire body tenses up. Her shoulder digs into the hard tile wall as the rest of her body thrusts up in the air towards Peeta and his euphoric tongue.

 

His fingers continue to explore around her pussy and his tongue wraps around her clit. It flicks against the tight bud. Peeta raises his eyes, watching her chest heave between uncontrolled moans. Katniss presses her hand against a mess of wet, blond curls. His mouth latches onto her clit harder, sucking in circular motions. When she can’t take it anymore, Katniss pulls his hair, yanking his mouth away from her center.

 

“I can’t wait anymore. I want you inside me, now,” she demands impatiently. “I need to feel every inch of your hard cock pounding into me.” She pushes Peeta powerfully against the marble tile.

 

“Are you sure?” Peeta asks, expressing his concern.

 

“I want to feel all of you,” she purrs. Carefully positioning one leg over his, Katniss sinks down slowly. They moan in unison when the tip dips into her center. She then slides in further and his cock fills her up, stretching her completely. Gripping his shoulders to brace her body, they start to move at a steady pace. Her hips rock forward against his pelvis.

 

Peeta lets out moans of encouragement as she threads her fingers through his hair and tugs on it slightly. He leans his head back, resting in between the corners of the tile. His eyes remain shut tight. They fit perfectly together. Roughly, Peeta snakes his hands to cup her ass. He kneads the firm cheeks, pulling her forward, closer to him.

 

Their slippery wet bodies continue to thrust together, guttural grunts escaping Peeta with each one. He pounds into her, deeper each time. “Fuck. Don’t stop, don’t stop,” she screams when he hits a spot and a spark of desire jolts through her entire body. Her pussy clenches its walls around his cock tightly, entrapping it. Pleasure builds up in her quickly before she releases a small cry as she comes undone. She can feel herself pulsing around his thick erection. Her toes curl up in bliss and her knees buckle. She nearly collapses onto the floor.

 

“You’re mine, Peeta Mellark.” Katniss hums, latching her lips onto his neck and begins to suck with passionate intent. She knows it’s childish, but she can’t help wanting to mark him as hers somehow.

 

“I’m yours! Shit, I’m almost there,” he mutters huskily. Then, suddenly, Peeta slips out of her dripping pussy. “Fuck, open your mouth for me.”

 

Hastily sinking down onto her knees, Katniss opens her mouth wide, letting her tongue out. She eagerly reaches out one hand to squeeze his balls gently and wraps the other around his thick shaft, patiently waiting for his release. He taps the fat head onto her tongue a couple times before his dick pulsates out ropes of warm cum all over her mouth and face. Persistent, Katniss suckles on the tip, lapping up every drop until it softens.

 

Delicately, she wipes her finger around the semen on her face and washes it off in the water. Peeta helps her get up from the floor. Katniss rinses her body once and makes her way to step out of the shower until he stops her.

 

“Unh-unh, where do you think you’re going?” He grabs her waist from behind and places her down gently beneath the running water. Squirting a bit of shampoo into his hands, Peeta begins to massage her scalp. “You’re still dirty.”

 

Katniss lets out a giggle and playfully squeals when he taps the tip of her nose, covering it in a layer of bubbles.

 

* * *

“So what should we do with our last few days?” Katniss asks. The thought has been haunting her over the past week. Their movie is coming to an end and, consequently, their affair would as well. Her mind whirls with the endless possibilities of how their relationship could thrive in other times, under different circumstances. But this is now. She has no control of the future. So instead, Katniss decides to spend the remaining time ignorantly in her paradise.

 

“I just want to spend every possible minute with you,” Peeta replies. So they lie there in bed together, their bodies pressed up warmly against one another. After spending years alone, Katniss revels in the luxury of having someone else next to her. It felt like an endless craving she didn’t even realize she had. Something she can’t fully satiate.

 

The thought of the nights ahead where she would be at home, alone in the darkness, seems daunting.

 

* * *

When daylight streams through the window, they wake up and find a note taped to the door. The rest of the day would be spent finishing up scenic shots and minor character scenes. They have the whole day to themselves.

 

“Let’s go somewhere,” Peeta says contentedly.

 

They drive, far away from the city. They spend the whole day doing little things they’ve wanted to do. They visit a waterfall, which roars with the sound of splashing rivers. They ride horseback side by side, trotting through the beautiful scenery. The sun shines warmly, but the wind keeps the weather cool. Finally, they rest, lying in a field beneath the sun.

 

Katniss leans against him, bringing her knees to her chest. He tucks his chin onto her shoulder, skimming his nose gently along her neck. They laugh. They talk. But neither mentions that this is the end.

 

After a while, she lies down and rests her head on Peeta’s lap. They sit in silence as she closes her eyes and he fiddles with her hair.

 

“I wish I could freeze this moment, right here, right now, and live in it forever,” he says, breaking the silence. Peeta’s hands still, tangled in her dark waves.

 

“Nothing lasts forever,” Katniss murmurs wistfully, the harsh truth slipping from her tongue. She lifts herself up and sits on her knees, turning towards Peeta. She reaches for his hands. “Promise me something.”

 

“Anything.”

 

“Say you’ll remember me,” she says.

 

“I’ll remember you,” Peeta replies immediately. He flashes her a smile when she scowls at him.

 

“I mean it. Say you’ll remember me when you look back at this memory. The first day we found each other. When we stared the sunset together. Promise me that you’ll remember us.” Her brows furrow and she swallows thickly.

 

Peeta places his hand on her jaw, softly moving his thumb back and forth along her cheekbones. “I will, I promise. I will see you again, Katniss.” His promise is unsatisfying. She tilts her head, leaning into his sturdy hand. “We’ll see each other again,” he repeats adamantly. Katniss closes her eyes in disappointment.

 

“Under different conditions, Peeta. I don’t–” her voice begins to crack. Her lips tremble and her eyes start to water, so she shakes her head from his grasp and scoots back. “I don’t know how I’m going to handle that.” Katniss fixes her gaze onto the blanket beneath them, twisting her hands into it.

 

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,’ he apologizes repeatedly. “I knew this would be hard. But we both started this, knowing how it has to end.” He hesitates momentarily, opening his mouth and closing it several times before letting any words actually seep out. “You know… you know that I love you, right?”

 

She freezes, irrational anger flashing hotly inside of her. She shouldn’t be angry. Peeta’s right. She could see the ending far before they began. Their end was an inevitable fate. But hearing those words is a game changer and it ignites a whirl of emotions, mostly of anger and hope. She chooses to kindle the hot spark of fury and douse the possibility of a future. Because rage builds resentment, and that’s what can tear them apart. _This is for the best_ , she thinks to herself. It’s easier to forget with bad memories.

 

“No. I’m just some whore that you fucked on set. Soon you’ll go back to your damn Hollywood fiancée. You’ll have your extravagant wedding with all the shitty glamour and live the rest of your perfect fucking life without me,” she snarls to instigate a fight. Her eyes become cloudy and chilly like a storm.

 

Peeta flinches; he wasn’t expecting this. His jaw tenses and he breathes deep, steady breaths. “God, don’t say that to me, Katniss. It’s practically a legal contract marriage.” His beautiful blue eyes are rimmed red and reflect the same wetness hers had just moments ago. “Where is this coming from? You know I can’t do anything about it.”

 

“There’s always something you can do. You’re just choosing not to,” she spits out heatedly. A humorless laugh escapes her throat. “It’s not enough.  _I’m_  not enough.”

 

“Shit, please.” Peeta’s mouth falls open, refusing to believe the vindictive feelings behind the words she hurled at him. “Don’t push me away. Don’t do this to us.”

 

When he tries to reach for her again, Katniss jumps onto her feet. “Don’t you get it? There is no us, Peeta! I’m not the one pushing you away. I’m not the one throwing away everything we have.” Her voice elevates into a loud shout. The stupid tears she tried so hard to keep in finally trickle down her cheeks. She bites down on her lip hard, refusing to let anymore tears seep out.

 

“You can’t have it both ways, Peeta,” she says flatly.

 

He pulls at his hair, tugging it roughly, his expression reflecting just how torn apart he feels about the situation. It pains Katniss to see how lost he looks, like a puppy without its owner. She desperately wants to wrap her arms around him and apologize for saying anything hurtful to him at all; to tell him that it’s not his fault. It would be so easy to just love him. But what good would that do for them? For anyone? There was no going back from this.

 

“We can make this work. We can try, Katniss.” He shifts his legs to stand up. They face each other with looks of defeat. Peeta stretches his arm toward her, his palm faced up towards the sky. “Please, we have to try,” he begs with longing eyes, pleading for her to take his hand.

 

She shakes her head furiously, dropping her sight to the ground. “No. I can’t. I won’t be someone you hide behind the cameras. I won’t sneak around you and your fiancée. That’s not fair for me or for her.”

 

“What do you want from me then?” he croaks, his words coming out in stutters. His throat swallows dryly and his shoulders heave heavily.

 

Katniss takes a deep breath as the cool air sends a shudder through her small body. Her sniffles have finally come to a stop. “You have to let me go.”

 

“What if I can’t?” Peeta whispers with a grimace. He slowly drops his arm down, already knowing the answer to his question. Her heart races, beating forcefully against her chest. At this point, ripping it out seemed much less painful.

 

“That’s not an option.”

 

* * *

She locks her door as soon as she steps into her trailer.

 

She spends the whole night packing.

 

She’s gone before the sun rises.

 

By the time he arrives at her door, the only trace left of her is a note.

 

_I’ll see you at the premiere. I love you too._

 

* * *

“Twirl for me.” Cinna delicately holds her hand from the podium and spins Katniss in circles. The strapless gown hugs every inch of her body perfectly and flares slightly at her ankles. The vibrant red compliments her deep olive skin tone. She smiles widely as the dress shimmers in the light, as if there were sparks of fire ready to burst out.

 

“You’re as radiant as the sun, my dear,” Effie nearly sobs in admiration. “Everyone on the red carpet is going to be filled with jealousy. Getting a Cinna original is unheard of!”

 

“Well, Katniss is my special girl.” He grins, patting her hand before letting it go. Cinna was only a junior designer when they first met by coincidence. He insisted on creating her very first red carpet gown. Since then, they remained friends and his dresses have made millions. Now he only makes haute couture. Celebrities have fought to wear his line to events. “So, all ready for the premiere tonight then?”

 

Her face drops cold. She knows what he’s really implying. Was she ready to see Peeta again, with his fiancée? After leaving the set, she spent weeks crying in bed. She hardly left her house and refused to do anything. Everything felt numb. The only thoughts that remained in her head were about Peeta. What was life like before she had met him? Why couldn’t she go back to that? It wasn’t until Cinna practically broke into her house for incessantly rejecting his calls that she began to come back to life.

 

She told him everything and he spent every day with her. He distracted her from remembering. Slowly, she started to leave the house and eventually life was seemingly back to normal. But no matter what she did, nothing filled the empty void buried deep within her.

 

“As ready as I could be,” she replies curtly. “I just hope the night doesn’t end with me in a disaster.”

 

Effie looks at her with her lips pressed together thinly. “Nonsense! You are the star of the show tonight. Everyone is going to want to be you.”

 

“Right now, I don’t want to be me,” Katniss mutters under her breath, low enough that Effie can’t hear.

 

“Your ride is here.” Cinna looks out the window with his arms crossed. “Are you sure you don’t want a date to this? I’m always available and I’ve got a shop full of tuxes I can change into.”

 

She smiles at his offer but shakes her head no. “I think it’ll be good to go alone.”

 

“Let me know if you need anything. I’ll be nearby,” Cinna assures her.

 

Katniss hugs both before leaving the studio, and laughs when Effie shouts from behind to remind her to actually smile for the cameras. To not be her usual self but her happier self, to quote Effie word for word. The entire ride feels excruciatingly long. She tries to calms herself, taking deep breaths in and out until her arrival.

 

Quickly swiping her sweaty palms onto the seat, she thanks the driver before opening the door to several bright flashes and a beautiful red carpet. With a wide smile, Katniss waves to the screaming fans and paparazzi. She’s immediately ushered up to a backdrop where she poses for several cameras.

 

After a few minutes, Caesar Flickerman whisks her away from the blinding lights for a quick interview. As she steps down from the stage, her eyes focus on a couple arriving. It’s him. Peeta looks utterly magnificent in a crisp, black tux. When she notices how Glimmer is draped on his arm, her heart drops. Glimmer’s blonde hair is perfectly curled and her black gown accentuates her generous curves. Katniss stares enviously at the jewel-encrusted top and sexy back meshing. It isn’t until she feels a tap on her shoulder that she reverts her attention back to Caesar.

 

“What?” she asks, confused.

 

“I think someone’s a little nervous,” he laughs enthusiastically into the camera. “I said, this is a beautiful dress you’re wearing. I have to know, who is it?”

 

“It’s a Cinna original,” Katniss replies dully, attempting to muster a weak smile. Caesar takes her hand and twirls her similarly to how Cinna had earlier.

 

“It’s gorgeous. You’re gorgeous! The camera just loves you. I must say, my heart stopped when I heard you would be coming back from a nine-year hiatus. What made you return?”

 

Distracted, Katniss skims the area trying not to lose sight of Peeta, but he’s already disappeared into the crowd. She gives up trying to search for him, it’s no use. “I guess I wanted to be part of something again. After I stopped acting, I didn’t do much. I told myself I would focus on trying new things, so I tried to pick up new hobbies. Turns out the only thing I’m really good at is acting,” she says with a light chuckle and the quirky host howls in laughter with her.

 

“Well, we look forward to your performance on the big screen tonight. Ladies and gentlemen, Katniss Everdeen!” Caesar bellows into the camera. He’s such a character; she can’t help but giggle as he grabs her for one last hug.

 

She suspects the doors should be opening up soon. As she walks up the stairs to the theater, Haymitch curtly waves for her attention. Beside him are Peeta, Glimmer, and a producer. Her eyes fix onto Peeta, and he doesn’t break the contact either. They stare longingly with disheartened grimaces. Their private moment is broken when Glimmer wraps her left hand, adorned with her opulent diamond engagement ring, into his and leans in for a casual kiss.

 

Letting out a slight gasp, Katniss diverts her gaze to the floor. She wasn’t ready for this. No amount of time would have prepared her to see the man she loved with someone else. She positions herself at the end, next to Haymitch, forcing a smile for the cameras once again. Abruptly someone pushes her towards the middle, in between Peeta and Haymitch, asserting that since she’s the star of the movie, she should be in the middle.

 

Katniss nervously stands next to Peeta, trying not to let her awkwardness show. Haymitch leans closer and whispers into her ear, making her jump in surprise, “Keep your composure, sweetheart. Don’t let them ruin your night.” He smiles sympathetically, which is a first for the aloof director. She reciprocates his support with a grateful smile and a nod.

 

Finally, the theater opens its entrance and the guests file into a large room. Trailing behind, Katniss bitterly scoffs to herself how Glimmer has latched onto Peeta all night and refuses to let go. She makes sure to sit at the end of the row. Thankfully, it’s also a few seats away from the couple. Yet, she can still hear Glimmer’s shrill voice cooing at how excited they are for their upcoming wedding. “We’re so happy together,” she claims, and Katniss rolls her eyes.

 

Once the lights dim, the buzzing comes to a halt and everyone’s attention is directed towards the large, glowing screen. Everything seems fine until the film reaches the first scene where they kiss. Memories from the set flood back into her head. The way his hand grabbed the nape of her neck. His soft lips pressed against hers. Their first drive out after shooting the scene.

 

She can feel his stare burning through her. When she turns, his eyes are desperate, illuminated by the light reflecting from the screen. He looks miserable. It hurts too much, and she can’t do this anymore. Katniss reaches out for her phone and sends Cinna a quick text to pick her up.

 

“I- I need to go. I’m sorry,” she whispers to Haymitch and he nods in understanding. Reporters would probably denounce her as a diva, claiming that she was too good to finish watching her own movie and support the crew at the after party. But she would much rather face these rumors than be forced to stay another minute in that theater, feeling her heart shatter into a million pieces yet again.

 

Quietly, she steps down the stairs of the theater and waits outside for Cinna. The streets are empty and dark, the opposite of how it was just a half hour ago. A few minutes have passed when a soft humming of a car approaches. Katniss walks towards it.

 

“Katniss, wait!”

 

The voice shakes her. Peeta has followed her outside. She debates for a second whether she should turn around or continue straight. Cinna stares at her from the window with a dubious look. Clicking her heels down the street, Katniss makes her choice to get in the car. Tears threaten to flow from her eyes when she discreetly looks into the rearview window. Peeta stands crushed in the middle of the street, and he gets smaller and smaller as they drive away.

 

“You can cry. Effie’s not here to nag you about messing up your makeup,” Cinna offers lightheartedly.

 

So she does.

 

* * *

When she wakes up, her eyes are puffy and swollen from all the crying. Katniss drags herself out of bed to wash her face. Her body feels lifeless. All the progress she made was torn down by one night. She kicks herself for feeling like this. One man shouldn’t make her mope for months. That’s not who she is, or at least who she was.

 

Leaving her bedroom, Katniss walks downstairs to the kitchen and winces at the sunlight streaming in through her windows. It’s too bright. She desperately wishes for darkness. Cinna had left a note on the fridge.

 

_You could use a little escape. Go to the cabin. I’ll meet you there._

 

The cabin. Cinna loves getting away from the city, and she loves nature. They would drive out of Los Angeles for hours to find a getaway. At some point, they began going so often they decided it would be easier to just buy a cabin together.

 

Her mind has been so preoccupied with thoughts of Peeta lately that she had completely forgotten about the cabin. She immediately packs a bag of essentials and gets into her car. The drive to Big Bear Lake only takes about two hours.

 

When she finally arrives, Katniss squints her eyes at the foreign car parked in their lot. Had Cinna bought a new one? Shrugging it off, she quickly gets out and revels at the beautiful sight. She immediately feels at home in the woods, inhaling the familiar scent of the trees.

 

“Cinna?” Katniss calls out after she enters the cabin. She frowns when he doesn’t answer. He has to be here somewhere. When she crouches down to take off her boots, she notices a pair of someone else’s by the front door, and they are definitely not Cinna’s.

 

“Katniss.”

 

Her heart stops for a moment before it begins thumping hard against her chest as if it was trying to escape the confines of her rib cage. Gradually, she rises from her squatted position and turns. Her ears hadn’t deceived her; Peeta is standing in front of her. Her heart feels heavy as she notices how broken he looks.

 

“What are you doing here?” she asks dumbly.

 

He keeps his distance. Contemplating how to answer her question, he shifts from side to side. “Your friend, Cinna. I just, I wanted to talk you, but I didn’t know how. You reject all my calls and last night,” he rubs his hand against the back of his neck, “last night didn’t exactly go how I planned.”

 

“Oh?” Katniss narrows her eyes and folds her arms against her chest. “How exactly was last night supposed to go?”

 

“I wanted to tell you how much I missed you. How I can’t get you out of my head. How every thought that crosses my mind is about you. How every sunset reminds me of you in that nice little dress.” He cautiously takes one step closer and Katniss stands still, letting him inch closer. “How I can’t let you go, no matter how hard I try.”

 

“None of that would have mattered, Peeta. Last night you still came with Glimmer. Do you know how it made me feel to see her wrapped around you all night? To listen to her talk endlessly about your wedding? As if you two were the happiest couple on earth?” Her bottom lip quivers and Katniss lowers her face. She can’t gather the courage to look at him without crying again.

 

“I messed up, I know. I’m sorry.” He takes another deliberate stride. “But it matters now, because I’m here. I’m yours.”

 

“What the fuck does that mean?” Katniss mutters, followed by a sniffle.

 

With a few more steps, Peeta closes the distance between them and rests his hand on her shoulders. He takes her braid and tenderly strokes the intricate weaving of her hair. He smiles warmly when she finally looks up. “It means, I’m yours. That is, if you still want me.”

 

Her eyes instantly well up and she forces a small smile.

 

“After seeing you leave last night, I realized how I couldn’t go through with any of this. I told Glimmer. She threw things at me,” he chuckles. “She was angry, but she let me go because on some level she knew how artificial our relationship was. I realized that it’s not too late. I can still keep my promise to myself. No one can control what I do anymore.”

 

“Peeta, your career. Everything you’ve worked for until now….”

 

“It doesn’t matter to me. You matter to me. You are enough.” He takes her hands in his and brings them to his lips.

 

Katniss stares incredulously with tear drops already streaming down her cheeks. “I don’t believe it. Is this–”

 

“Real?” Peeta finishes her thought. “This is real. We’re real.” He brushes his thumb over her cheek, wiping the droplets away.

 

Finally, he slants down and their lips meet for the first time in months. It sparks a hunger in Katniss, as if she had been starving for days and Peeta was her bread. He was a craving she could never quit. She nips at his bottom lip playfully, biting down with just enough pressure. Her teeth bump against his soft skin when she smiles. Their foreheads move back and forth against each other.

 

She murmurs with a happy sigh, “Never in my wildest dreams did I think I’d get to kiss you again.”

**Author's Note:**

> Shoutout to dandelion-sunset and papofglencoe for betaing. This story would be nothing without your advice and suggestions. You ladies are amazing!
> 
> Come find me on tumblr @peetasblueyes


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